Abel Reyna Saves Waco from Biker Scum

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Bring your greasy apehangers to Waco this Sunday, you unchurched, beer-guzzling clutchmonkies, and we will throw your sweaty asses under the Harwell Center!

Abel Reyna (AR) and Sgt. Patrick Swanton must have been sweating cold as they blitzed the media with apocalyptic visions of SAMCRO and the Mayans stabbing, shooting, and raping their way across Central Texas Marketplace during church hour, with the heroic police saving the day. But it was showtime, and the news cameras were already rolling. And thus, the "biker shootout" meme was born.

"They were not here to drink and eat barbecue," Swanton said as he relayed his conspiracy theory. "They came here with violence in mind." Later, he added "There were so many rounds fired from bad guy weapons here."

But those watching closely noticed that Swanton was trying just a bit too hard this time. Nine people were dead and dozens had been injured in what may have been the bloodiest police / biker incident in history. One of the deceased, Jesus Delgado Rodriguez, was a decorated Vietnam vet and Purple Heart winner with no criminal history. In fact, only five of the nine dead had a rapsheet in Texas. National media now reports that the same is true for a majority of the bikers who were there.

Not that any of these issues could have slowed down major league crime-buster AR. Thanks to District Attorney Abel Reyna, there are now 170 people facing felony charges of engaging in organized criminal activity in McLennan County, all stemming from one event. It's unknown how many were present at the shooting, and how many were arrested later. Nor do we know how many were driving to the scene intending to add to the mayhem, and how many were merely being a biker on Sunday. But by that evening, Reyna was certain he had probable cause to charge the lot of them with a felony. He also defended the bonds that had been set across the board at a staggering one million dollars.

One of Swanton's first statements was to blame the restaurant management for allowing the biker sinners to congregate there. "What happened here today could have been avoided ... They [Twin Peaks management] failed and this is what happened," he said.

"Are we frustrated? Sure," Swanton said, according to CNN. "Because we feel like there may have been more that could have been done by a business to prevent this."

The managers of Twin Peaks denied this charge, yet that did not prevent corporate from immediately revoking their franchise. "Biker" events have now been suspended at Twin Peaks locations across the country.

AR stoked Waco's hyperefficient rumor mill by declaring that the fight had resulted from long-simmering tensions between rival gangs. Swanton caught that 40-yard pass and ran it clear to the cheerleaders, stating that all of the clubs had gathered to violently settle a turf dispute in broad daylight. In front of the police. In a public establishment. With security cameras.

Yet few of the reporters must have researched what all of the real bikers told them about Sunday's scheduled event before filing their stories and diving in front of the cameras. Because if they had (as the New York Post did), they surely would have come across the website of the Texas Confederation of Clubs and Independents (CoCI).

CoCI is a statewide organization of motorcyclists that is organized into regions-- much like the Knights of Columbus, except with more chrome and leather. Waco is in CoCI Region 1. As it turns out, CoCI was scheduled to meet at Twin Peaks on Sunday, May 17th at 1:00PM-- minutes after the shooting began. The previous meeting of Region 1 was scheduled at Bikini's Sports Bar & Grill in Austin on Sunday, January 25th.

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Curiously, CoCI held another event last month, called Texas CoCI Christian Unity at the American Legion Hall in Georgetown. The description:

This event is open to everyone. We want to include Christians from all traditional MC's and not just the Christian MC's and MM's. You are welcome even if you are not a Christian, but the event will be Christian by nature. This is a Texas COC&I Christian Unity event and will be MC'ed by HonorBound MM Duane Gryder.

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So far, no reports of wanton whoring and bloodshed at that event have reached this writer. The same is true for this event from last year:

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There was also another event on the CoCI callendar last month called Guardian's [sic] of the Children 7th Annual Fund Raiser.
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That's no joke. You can check the Google Calendar on their website yourself. By most accounts, nothing even close to Sunday's violence has ever happened at a COCI meeting in all the years it has existed, which is unsurprising since COCI is clearly not a criminal organization.

But enough from the forked tongues of Satan's bastards. Let's get back to AR and Swanton. Here are some details muddled in-- or curiously absent from-- their immediate press onslaught:

  • The number of undercover officers present posing as bikers, and what they were doing
  • How the fight started. First it was in the restroom. Then it was a parking spot dispute, then a foot that was run over when the Cossacks showed up. Which was it, Sargeant Swanton?
  • The number of bikers that were shot by other bikers, versus how many were shot by the police and SWAT officers who had been there before the fight started
  • The actual number of weapons seized from bikers who were at the initial fight. First it was over 100, then 50, then 1000 (?!). Latest count is 318, including 118 handguns and 157 knives. For what it's worth, possession of a handgun in Texas is legal if it is hidden in a vehicle, and a handgun can be carried concealed on one's body if the person is licensed. All single-edged knives with a blade measuring 5.5" in length or less are legal in Texas, incuding automatic knives or "switchblades." But that didn't stop some media dolts from reporting the presence of "assault-style knives", whatever that means. In any case, Sargeant Swanton warned that these numbers may continue to rise.
  • How may non-criminal motorcycle clubs and charitable organizations were present, in addition to the allegedly psychopathic, cop-slaying Bandidos (see quote below), Cossacks and Scimitars. One report suggests that these clubs were also present:


Last Sunday evening, Swanton alerted the public that one of the gangs involved had ordered their members to "kill anyone in uniform." Horrified, the good folk of Waco feared that the evil Bandidos would descend upon them like the Huns of old, laying waste to the city's quivering gendarmerie and absconding with the virginity of their daughters.

How did we learn this? Well, you know. Facebook.

Much to Waco's relief, a national officer for the Bandidos publicly denied the threat the very next day:

"How long do you think the Bandidos motorcycle organization would last if we went out shooting at cops?" he questioned. "President Obama himself would send out the Air Force, the Army, the Marine Corp [sic] and everybody and take us out. There's no way. We respect the police for doing their job."
-Jimmy Graves, head of the Texas CoCI and national officer of the Bandidos MC

Steve Cochran, an official with the U.S. Defenders Task Force (a legislative group affiliated with CoCI) who rode up on the mayhem, gave the Waco Trib a similar characterization of Sunday's intended meeting. Cochran claims that the meeting was to focus on legislative issues rather than a turf dispute. He added, "Any fifth-grader with a smartphone could have figured that out."

Nevertheless, Waco PD asked the local Harley dealership to remained closed, and for motorcyclists not to ride in Waco for the time being. Just in case.

By Wednesday, some serious problems began to emerge with Swanton's story. Twin Peaks management had shown the CCTV footage from the shooting to the Associated Press, which stated that the video showed only one biker firing a gun, while most ran inside for cover. Other "citizen/journalist" outlets noticed that this coverage conflicted with several of Swanton's statements.

Even then, the legendary Facebook DA showed no signs of backing down. "I'm not going to let the number of cases we face to stand [sic] in the way of justice for the citizens of this county," Reyna declared Wednesday afternoon. But by Thursday evening, the pressure was mounting, and it showed in AR's deer-in-headlights act for the local news, in which he urged "communication." Perhaps he had just seen the post on a Washington blog interpreting Waco officials' conflicting statements as evidence of official murder.

We want communication too, Mr. Reyna. How may of those remarkably precise head and torso shots were made with 5.56mm SWAT rounds?


Among the bikers arrested and hit with a million dollar bond was Martin Lewis, a retired San Antonio detective who was working as a busdriver-- until he was fired when his employers learned of his arrest.

If AR and Swanton persist in their arrogance as emerging facts destroy their narrative, they might head down to Martin's jail cell and witness the glamourous retirement that awaits lawmen who fall from grace.